March 29, 2024

All the Naked Dudes in the Game of Thrones Season Five Premiere (NSFW)

Loras Tyrell and Olyvar Game of Thrones nude bed

HBO’s Game of Thrones has taken a lot of criticism for its hypersexualized depictions of female characters, including charges of misogyny and the objectification of female actors by way of sexual violence and gratuitous nudity. Several of the show’s stars, including Kit Harington (Jon Snow), Natalie Dormer (Margaery Tyrell), and Jacob Anderson (Grey Worm), have spoken out in support of more male nudity in the program, operating under the assumption that the show’s sexuality is one of its strong points and would only be made better with a little more equal time depicting it’s appealing male cast in the buff.

Judging by the first episode of the fifth season, Game of Thrones’ showrunners have taken that criticism to heart in releasing a premiere that spent roughly 300% more time gazing longingly on the male physique than it did featuring naked women. Sure, there was a disturbing brothel scene featuring the bare breasts of three ladies, as one of Grey Worm’s warrior-eunuch underlings stopped by for some sexless nurturing only to be ambush-executed by a mysterious giant in a creepy gold mask. By my iPhone stopwatch, total female nudity in that scene lasted about a minute. Another three full minutes were devoted to an equal number of hot men flaunting their naked bodies.

While Hodor isn’t around to speak out for Women’s Rights as The Onion‘s Clickhole requested in a recent editorial, we’re here to celebrate something roughly akin to equality with screengrabs of the hottest naked dudes in this week’s episode. Keep scrolling for that NSFW man booty:

Loras Tyrell gets busy with his new fling Olyvar, only to be interrupted by his sister (and queen) Margaery Tyrell. She seems to think Olyvar is easy on the eyes herself. Olyvar runs Littlefinger’s brothel while the latter attempts to conquer the world with Sansa Stark at his side:

Loras Tyrell and Olyvar Game of Thrones gay sex

Loras Tyrell and Olyvar Game of Thrones nude

Olyvar naked butt Game of Thrones nude

Loras Tyrell and Olyvar Game of Thrones nude bed

Daenerys Targaryen–who has reportedly refused to film any more nude scenes after her body was featured prominently in the first three seasons–schemes with her boy-toy, Daario Naharis, as he pours her a drink in the buff:

Daenerys Targaryen and Daario Naharis Nude-bar

Daenerys Targaryen and Daario Naharis Nude-bar front

Daenerys Targaryen and Daario Naharis Nude

About Alibi Pierce 193 Articles
Curates Noise Journal

1 Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. The Hound just threw major shade at the man bun

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